Do You Pick Your Home or Does Your Home Pick You?

Do You Pick Your Home or Does Your Home Pick You?, LVBX Magazine
THE HOLISTIC CONVERSATION with Tisha Morris

Homes are like relationships. Some are karmic, some are memorable, some not so memorable, some are challenging, and some you fall completely in love with at first sight. You’ve most likely had a variety of these experiences with places you’ve lived.

Recently, someone told me a story where they stepped into a home and immediately knew it was “the one.” The realtor commented, “The home picked you!”

In this person’s case, soon after moving in, things didn’t feel quite right. The honeymoon was quickly over as insect and rodent issues began to creep in (always a sign that you’re not fully committing your energy to the space).

Turns out, her attraction to the home was due to it being an almost exact replica of her childhood home. This is quite common and a lot of times the reason why couples can’t agree on a home – they are each vying for the home that feels like “home” based on their childhood home. This can show up in the style of the home or even specific floor plan arrangement. Sometimes there may even be an unconscious recognition of a home from a past life that was meaningful in some way.

These karmic pulls are strong and can feel as though the house is picking you, just like when you meet someone who tugs on a core emotional wound from childhood. Just like this home, it’s love at first sight because of the familial recognition.

It’s never happenstance where you end up living. There has to be a vibrational match between you and the space. So, yes, the house picks you AND you pick the house. For example, if you end up in a home with a missing Love Corner (per the bagua map in feng shui), then you were a vibrational match to that energy. Another example is the numerology of a home – regardless of whether you are aware of numerology, or not, you will select a home that is a vibrational match to you.

If you try to move before you have worked out what brought you to the space, the same issues will follow you to the next home. This is why moving is a last resort when it comes to feng shui remedies. Whatever drew you to the space to begin with must be completed before moving on, just like relationships. When you have shifted your energy to a different vibration, only then will you no longer be a match and you will move with ease.

The more conscious we are about our self, feng shui, and why we are really drawn to a space, the more conscious we can be about the choices we make. In the story above, now that she is aware of why she was drawn to the space, she can consciously heal childhood patterns, while also enjoying the feeling of being at home.

This is true in every area of our lives. The more conscious we are of our Self, our preferences, our triggers, and our shadows, the more conscious we can be in our choices. No longer do we need to repeat karmic patterns.

In the same way you wouldn’t go out with everyone who asks you out, you shouldn’t sign the dotted line on every space that “picks” you. And if it’s love at first sight, by all means, go for it. It’s a co-creative process between both of you that will lead to a harmonious living experience, for better or worse.


Tisha Morris is the best-selling author of Decorating With the Five Elements of Feng Shui (Llewellyn 2015), Mind Body Home: Transform Your Life One Room at a Time (Llewellyn 2012), Feng Shui Your Life: The Quick Guide to DeclutteringYour Home and Renewing Your Life (Turner Publishing 2010). Tisha is based in Los Angeles where she works with homes and business and facilitates trainings. To learn more, visit Earth Home with Tisha Morris.

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